How To Select a Great Coach

Coaches are everywhere. It is difficult to find a domain where coaches are not present.

  • Football Coach
  • Track Coach
  • Golf Coach
  • Tennis Coach
  • Debate Coach
  • Job Coach
  • Executive Coach
  • Career Coach

Even if the title “coach” is not applied, often a person is still functioning as a coach. Sometimes we use the words “mentor” and “teacher” to refer to a coach.

What does it mean to coach, and why is it so important? To coach is to instruct, direct, train intensively, and to demonstrate. If you want to learn some new practice or activity that is not natural, you will learn faster and become better if you have a competent coach who can show you how to do it. Perhaps you want to learn to play golf. There is nothing natural about playing golf. How should you grip the club? Which club should you use? How is the golf swing started? What about the stance? Where should the ball be placed relative to your feet? How do you putt the ball? All of these questions and hundreds more need to be answered in order to become a good golfer. Not only do you need to know the answers to these questions, you need to actually practice doing them. Golf is a physical game that requires you actually golf. So, in addition to telling you how to do something and demonstrating how to do it, a coach also trains you. That is, she has you practice the behavior over and over until you do it right. Depending on what you are learning, the coach can be very demanding. This is the reason coaches are often viewed as strong leaders and disciplinarians. They train, direct, and instruct.

You Have to Want It

The truth is that no coach can coach you if you do not want to be coached. If your coach has told you to go run stairs to improve your fitness level, you will only run those stairs if you choose to do it. If you choose not to run those stairs when the coach has directed you to do it, there may well be consequences. For instance, you may be removed from the team. Or, you may simply not get to play. But, that is your choice and your right (at least in environments with individual liberties to choose). So, even though we may gripe and complain about how unreasonable the coach is being, ultimately we choose to be coached because we think it is important to achieve our ambition.

Have you noticed that it is not only the beginner that gets coached? The teams that are at the top of the sports world have coaches. Professional teams have the highest paid coaches. What this demonstrates is that coaching is vital in not only learning the basics, it is vital in learning how to achieve higher and higher levels of expertise. If this were not the case, the world’s greatest golfers would just direct their own practices and analyze their own swings. The better the player, the better coach he or she demands. This is because those players recognize the need for coaching and they want it. If they did not want it, they would not submit to coaching.

Competent Coaches

Unfortunately, not everyone that desires to coach is very good at it. If the golf coach you select doesn’t know much about golf or doesn’t know how to effectively teach you the game, how will that impact you? You will learn wrong information, develop bad habits, and likely not achieve your ambition. This is why it is so important to select your coaches carefully. Not everyone that wants to coach you is competent to do so. If you are a  middle school athlete, you don’t have a choice about who coaches you. If you want to play, you get the coaches that the school has assigned to coach you. Many of those coaches are outstanding, but some of them are still learning themselves how to coach.

Let’s move from school coaching and athletics to other domains of coaching. As stated at the outset, there are executive coaches, career coaches, and coaches for many different professional ambitions. If your ambition is to be a great sales professional, you need to select a great sales coach. You need someone competent to coach effective selling philosophy and to help you develop good selling behaviors. It is extremely important that you select someone with a proven track record of success. You need competency and effectiveness. How do you find it? The same way you select the hiring of a key employee or the purchase of an expensive car or piece of capital equipment. You do your “due diligence.”

Due Diligence

The concept of due diligence is well established in business and law. The term refers to a process of research, conversation, and discovery by which you get to the real truth. If you are looking to purchase a business from someone, you need to know the true status of the business, not just the pretty photos and the company narrative. You need to look into the books to see what the revenues and expenses are. You need to see the balance sheet to understand the company’s assets and liabilities. You need to speak to employees and customers to gauge the company’s strengths and weaknesses. Before you spend your money to buy this business, you need to be sure you have done your homework.

The decision about who will coach you deserves the same level of scrutiny. There are three important ways to search for a competent coach:

  1. Internet. As with most research these days, it will probably involve the internet. There is a wealth of information at click of a SEARCH button.
  2. Network. Speak to the people in your network about the subject of coaching. Find those people who are the best at what you want to do and ask them if they use coaches. Ask for specific names of coaches that they recommend.
  3. Interview. Once you have identified potential coaches, schedule an appointment to discuss their services. Plan your questions before you meet, and treat it like an employment interview. In a way it is. You will want to know his coaching philosophy, formal instruction methods, and costs. Don’t forget that a great coach can help you achieve levels that you never before thought possible, so while cost is important, the cheapest is not necessarily the best.

People who are serious about their careers, sports, or other endeavors look for the best coaches. Hopefully your Forward Story will include the need for and commitment to personal growth in one or more fields of endeavor. If so, having a great coach can be a vital ingredient. The best coaches are competent and have a track record. Make it your goal to find a great coach to help you achieve your ambition.

 

 

Today I’m 50 – Now What? Maybe Write a Book!

I recall as a kid being really excited about birthdays. What was not to love? My friends and family made a big deal out the fact that on that date some number of years before, I made my exit from one environment into another. I was the center of attention on that day each year. There were presents, there was cash, there were games, there was singing, and best of all, there was cake. Let them eat cake! What a great thing.

At some point in my adolescence I stopped getting so excited about birthdays. As an adult I observed the annual ritual with indifference as the various milestones clicked past like so many center stripes on a long road trip.

  • At 30 I remember feeling like a “real” adult.
  • At 40 I felt like I had gained some wisdom.
  • Now that I am 50, what do I think? What am I feeling?

According to the United Nations, the average life expectancy of an American male is 75.6 years. What does this mean to me?

  • The hypochondriac in me says that there are a lot of things that will probably get me well before 75.6.
  • The optimist in me says that I will live to be 100.
  • The realist in me says that this means I only have around 25.6 years left. Unless, of course, the Mayans are right (but that’s another story).

Which will it be? I have no crystal ball, so I have no idea. I am not losing sleep over it, either.

I began this blog on July 20,2010 with an initial post on narrative. Before now I have never promoted the blog. I have told a few people about it, and a few more have stumbled upon it, but I have not sought widespread readership. In the past 20 months I have written on a variety of topics all revolving around the idea that all people should be working on a story that looks forward, into the future. I call it a Forward Story.

As I celebrate my half century on the planet today I am taking the wraps off my plan to publish my first book in 2012 entitled Forward Story. While I have been sporadically writing the blog, I have also been working on the book. In writing style the book will be specifically targeted to young people up to their mid-20s, but it will have something to say to all of us, including those 50 and above. The fact is that regardless of your age, you need to have a story for where you are headed. Writing the book Forward Story has been a part of my personal Forward Story for a while now. This is the year to launch it.

This website will be the primary place to keep informed about the book. Feel free to subscribe to the RSS feed or otherwise bookmark forwardstory.com. You can also follow us on twitter at www.twitter.com/forward_story The exact timeframe for publication is not set, but I am committed to publication before the end of the year. In the meantime, feel free to poke around the site and join in the conversation.

Regardless of how many candles you will find on your cake this year, I hope you are writing a beautiful and meaningful Forward Story. Thanks for stopping by. Come back soon.

An Update: It took a lot longer than I hoped, but the book has arrived. You can get your copy here:


Forward Story: Write the Future You Desire

 

Vicissitudes

Words are sometimes strange and wonderful. I am certain this is the case in every language. In the English language, one of those strange words is vicissitudes. It is not used very often. When it is, it is usually something like this:

James had great intentions to be there for his friends, but the vicissitudes of life changed all of that.

The word has come into English from French (and Latin before that) from words that mean change and alternation. There are two primary usages of the word. One is just the idea of alternating change, and that change is a natural state of things. The other usage is that often these changes that we encounter can be described as either positive or negative. Usually the word is used for negative events or changes in a person’s life. For this usage Merriam-Webster says:

a difficulty or hardship attendant on a way of life, a career, or a course of action and usually beyond one’s control

The reason this somewhat rare word came to my mind is that in recent conversations with my daughter about writing our Forward Stories, she offered the opinion that writing a Forward Story might not be practical given that events occur in our lives that we neither envision nor control.

Vicissitudes.

What I tried to convey to her is that her Forward Story must embrace these uncertainties. Which is more powerful?

  • Not writing a story because there are uncertainties ahead? or
  • Writing one that acknowledges those vicissitudes?

To refuse to plan for the future or lay out a desired story for where you are headed because you cannot see the future misses the point. The point is not to write a Forward Story that will appear accurate in hindsight. The point is to create a story that is in harmony with your ambitions and that guides you into effective actions that lead to the future you desire.

When in the process of living out your Forward Story you are confronted with vicissitudes, it is time to reevaluate your Forward Story and write a new one. Likely the new Forward Story will simply be a revision of the previous one. The revision will grapple with the new reality and plot a new path forward to achieving your ambitions.

This is the reason that we advocate a regular review and revision of your Forward Story. The masterpiece you are writing is actually the life you live as a result of having a Forward Story that is connected to who you are and what you want your life to be about. Do not let life’s vicissitudes have the final word. Adapt and move forward.

 

The Khan Academy – A Blessing for Learners Everywhere

My wife and I are big fans of the CBS television news magazine 60 Minutes. We think Scott Pelley and that team are talented and courageous journalists. As people committed to lifelong learning, we were very excited about last night’s feature of the Khan Academy. Started by Sal Khan to help his cousin with math, Khan Academy is making an immeasurable impact on teaching around the world. It is allowing awesome teachers like Courtney Cadwell (featured in the report) to be effective coaches of the subjects they teach.

A vital part of my Forward Story is continual learning throughout my life. I am about to turn 50, and I feel as though I am just getting started with all the learning I want to do. I have now become a member of Khan Academy and am really excited about the value I am going to produce from it. Some of it will be a refresher for me of material I learned long ago but have not reviewed in a while. This is the “use it or lose it” principle, and I think that is very important.  Some of it will be brand new learning for me.

As you create and maintain your Forward Story, look for ways for Khan Academy to assist you. If you are in middle school or high school and have a dream of attending college one day, Khan Academy is your friend. If you are a college student now and are struggling with some concept, you can find help at Khan. If you are an adult, you can reach new heights with this type of learning.

I highly recommend that you watch the 60 Minutes segment: http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=7401696n

Thank you to Sal, his team, and to those teachers and administrators who are making this work for their students. Bravo!

What I Learned from Margot’s Frozen Yogurt

When I was in my late twenties, I acted upon a desire to start my own business. The allure of being one’s own boss is very strong, and creating a business is one of the most exciting things a person can do. It was certainly exciting for my wife and me to start a frozen yogurt shop in Santa Fe, New Mexico.

The Author in Santa Fe – circa 1989

Rather than relate every detail of the start-up and operation, let me tell you about the challenges we faced and what I learned from them.

Under-Capitalized

We began Margot’s with virtually no capital of our own.  This meant that we had to borrow money to get started. At the time my desire to start the business was so strong that I was willing to borrow money to buy equipment and lease space. The idea was to invest a lot of our own sweat equity into the place and to buy the bare minimum of equipment required to get up and running. Then, we would upgrade from the profits of the business as time unfolded.

This was a problem on two fronts.

1. The strategy of buying just enough equipment to get started soon became a problem. The two soft-serve yogurt machines we could afford with our borrowed money were new machines, but they were air-cooled machines. We had selected a great location for the shop, so getting traffic into the place was no problem. In fact, the first day we were opened a line formed and stayed all day. This meant that the front door stayed open most of the day allowing the warm summer air to come into the shop.

As the ambient air warmed up, the air-cooled machines had to run more to keep the yogurt frozen. The more the machines ran, the more heat they threw off. We created a heat spiral. At one point it got so hot behind the counter that all of our chocolate toppings melted together in their respective containers. The machines could not keep up with the rising heat, and the product started coming out too soft. This heat problem remained until the day we sold the business.

What was the cause of the problem? We didn’t have enough money to buy the more expensive closed-loop (glycol) cooled machines or even water-cooled machines. If we had been able to afford those machines, we would have avoided this serious heat problem.

2. Given that we could not afford the proper machines, you might think that the solution to the problem would have been to have borrowed more money at the outset to buy the better machines.  That, however, would have just exacerbated problem number two. When you borrow money from a bank or any other creditor, that creditor has to be repaid with interest. This means that every month without fail, we had to write a  check to the bank for $800 to repay our business loan. That business loan, by the way, was personally guaranteed by my wife and me. Our home and vehicles were collateral for the loan. If we did not repay the loan as per its terms, really bad things would have happened to us.

So if we had borrowed more money up front, the monthly payment would have just been larger. When your new business is struggling to get off the ground, paying $800 per month to service debt doesn’t help matters.

What Would Have Worked?

My older wiser self would tell the young 20-something to save money toward the opening of the business. That requires patience. Patience is a four-letter word to people like my younger self. I had the idea, I had the location, and my mind was made up. I did not care that I had no money and no experience in the industry at all.  It was time to shoot now and ask questions later.

If I would have piled up cash first before starting my business, I would have begun Margot’s Frozen Yogurt without debt, with the proper equipment, and with much better prospects for long-term survival and expansion. Eventually we sold to a couple that was properly capitalized. The first thing they did was to replace the air-cooled machines with glycol-cooled machines. Because they had no debt, the operation of the business was a lot less stressful.

Conclusion

I realize that entrepreneurs as a class are risk-takers. I am one. However, I strongly recommend that anyone planning to start a business begin with their own personal finances first so that they can start setting aside capital to begin the new venture on solid footing. If you can live below your current means, you can stack up cash so that you can use your own money and avoid the business debt trap.

If you are an aspiring entrepreneur, don’t let this article discourage you. I believe in entrepreneurism. In fact, I love business. I just want you to be aware of some of the pitfalls of starting your own business so you don’t have to repeat my mistakes. Despite our challenges, Margot’s Frozen Yogurt was a tremendous blessing to us. It taught me many lessons that I took with me into the classroom as I finished my BBA. It continues to help me in all of my current business ventures. The people I met and worked with at Margot’s were tremendous. We got to employ a lot of excellent people in the Santa Fe community, including a lot of wonderful young people at Santa Fe Preparatory School. These were impressive people that blessed us. We got to know our customers well, and we loved serving locals as well as tourists and celebrities (like Brian Dennehy and Karen Grassle). All in all, we would not trade the experience.

If your Forward Story includes starting a business, I strongly recommend that you educate yourself as much as possible about not only your desired industry, but also about the wisest ways to finance, launch, and run your business. It is a lot easier to learn from those who have made mistakes than it is to repeat those mistakes on your own.

Wisdom in Entrepreneurship

A friend recently told me about a young man who earned his MBA, worked for a year, lost his job, and got disillusioned about the corporate world. Instead of searching for a job he decided to start a new business.

Starting a new business is part of many Forward Stories. The thrill of entrepreneurship attracts many people, including me. However, the voice of experience has something to say to people like this young man. This voice of experience is my own. I have learned many things from the four businesses I have started.

This young man did not ask for my advice, but if he had here is what I would have told him:

1. Don’t Quit Your Day Job. Listen, the grocery store does not accept as payment your plans, hopes, and dreams. Neither does your landlord. They accept cold, hard cash or, in some cases, plastic. In that case, the credit card company accepts cold, hard cash. It is very possible in free societies to continue earning a living to pay the bills while starting your business on the side.

While I have not yet read it, I know enough about his thesis to recommend the new book by Jon Acuff entitled Quitter. The premise is that you do not have to accept the myth that the only way to achieve your dream and start your business is to go “all in” and roll the dice. There is a much wiser way to be a “quitter.”

If you have already quit your day job, find another one. Work at being great in everything you do. Start your business on the side and build it to greatness.

2. It Takes Money, but Don’t Borrow It. Starting any business takes some money. You may need to buy a computer, business cards, equipment, or any number of other “necessities.” The temptation is there to borrow the money either from a bank or on your credit cards. Don’t do it! Nothing is more discouraging than starting  a new business, earning revenue from your products or services, and then turning around and sending it all to your creditors.

So how do you do it without credit? Well, you could start with a pile of cash that you have saved up. That is the way the old-timers did it. You know, set aside money for a purpose and then use the money to achieve that purpose? That is called delayed gratification, and it is a very odd concept these days.

You could also choose to cash flow those items you need to start your business. How about using your old computer or finding one on eBay or at the local thrift shop? How about using that old computer and some free software to print your own business cards? How about renting your equipment for a specific job to generate profits from which you can buy your own used equipment?

This myth of necessary debt has sunk many a new business. If your business does fail, it is really discouraging to be obligated to continue paying credit card bills on a bunch of business stuff that you no longer have. When that happens each month’s credit card bill is a bitter reminder of your failure.

3. It Is Harder Than it Looks. To those who have never owned a business it appears easy. It is not. My goal is not to discourage you if you want to start a business. I am just saying that there is a reason to be conservative in your projections for revenue and be liberal in your projections for expenses. It is going to take longer than you think it is to achieve sustainable profitability.

Not only is it difficult to win new customers, it is also takes time and energy to take care of all of the required responsibilities in government reporting, bookkeeping and accounting, and taxes. If you hire employees, now you have the additional burden of making payroll, paying employment taxes, and handling employee problems. It is no walk in the park!

I have found that many people who leave the corporate world in frustration discover that owning their own business just shifts the burdens to them as the employer. Now they are wearing the boss hat. If they then decide that owning a business is not what they thought it was, they often return to the corporate world with a greater appreciation for being an employee and for how hard it is to be the employer. Often a paycheck never looked so good.

Conclusion

In future posts I will share some of the specifics of the businesses I have started and what I learned from them. A big part of wisdom is not only learning the hard way yourself, it is also learning from the experiences, mistakes, and successes of others.

Develop a Forward Story that includes your business, but do it with wisdom, patience, and realism. That is part of becoming an adult.